Can these things crawl up my butt?

Saturday. Morgan and I were up early and Morgan cleaned a little bit. She pointed out to me these gray tick looking bugs crawling down the center of our bed, and I about pooped my pants. I slept with that...our relationship went from non-existent to sleeping together and I didn't approve of this. Morgan washed the sheets but I could still see there little gray legs flying a mile a minute into my sheets. All day consisted of the pool, reading, pool, pool, and more pool. We sat in the water for hours, we read for an hour then sat in the water again for another couple of hours. We didn't take ANY pool pictures today, it was nuts. Really nuts for me because I go coo coo cachoo for my camera and those photos. Jen and Manda made us some scrambled eggs that were a little off of American scrambled eggs but still were delicious. While we were doing that I noticed some little gray fuzzies stuck to Clyde's ear hair, looking closer it was those freaky little bug tick nuggets. I was freaking out. I held Clyde while vet daughter Morg plucked and smushed them, some of them curdling Clyde's blood. Poor guy. Then it came down to plucking them off of his genitalia...Morgan held his body upright and put a hard core grip on his wittle jaw so he wouldn't bite off any appendages while I (the hater of all bugs ever) snatched the grey buggers up and crunched them under my fingers. I felt the hard coating bend and snap under my fingers sending shivers up my spine and making me want to vomit. I hate bugs that much. I got them all though and thought I deserved one of those Boy Scout Brave Badges. JJ is our new project because he has just as many minature scary lion eaters. For precaution we striped the beds and are not allowing any more cuddling with the cute puppies or stupid, stupid, stupid cat. Also I was F R E A K I N G out about those guys running through my scalp...I have had lice one too many times to know that bugs sucking the life out of you is not a good feeling and I can't sleep for days...I was determined for this not to happen, EVER. I showered and looked at my crevices and then forced Morgan to comb through my hair while she ate her Popsicle. She didn't find any...BUT I think I can feel them. Oh, that is also where the title of this particular blog comes from. I was very concerned that they can crawl into my butt, plant themselves and turn me into the steam hut for the creepy grey colored tick buddies, Not Okay... 

Mah Sunburn...Awkward

We tried to catch the 8 o'clock bus...but it never came...well...it did but it was on the :25 and so we sat and Jenna made noises that made the Spanish people around us stare even harder. At one point she was looking at the schedule and yelled "Savido!!!" but with a manly high voice and the Spanish boy standing next to us just starts laughing, hard. She was a hoot and obviously delusional. The bus was packed and I sat next to a man...well I think it was a man. He was dressed in capri pants with a girly bag around his body, a teal shirt and a fluffy hat, oh but he had a nice big hairy mustache that kind of set me straight to his gender. Male. Anyways he kept pushing his arm into mine...which...crap I didn't want to have to say this but...Is sunburned severely, just one arm Mom and really awkwardly...but it hurt. I kept moving closer to the glass and he would just press his arm to mine. He wasn't even cold but my arm was protruding heat, smoking furiously. I don't know what his deal was but he most definitely trying to touch my arm lots. 


The original plan was to go eat dinner then go see Flamenco dancing. We ate at this restaurant who had English menus and looked like chicken nuggets. Our waiter slightly resembled Mr. Pyette and was quite sly. He played around with the menus...you know what I am talking about the "I am going to act like I am giving this to you but pull away when you reach" game and joked with us, he also spoke little English. He wanted to take our drink order and Morg and I got chocolate milkshakes (known to the Americans as chocolate milk) and Jenna ordered a Coca-Cola Light and before Amanda could make any sort of move to order he just walked away. We all laughed and joked that he probably can read minds and we will all be sufficiently worried if he comes back with a Coca-Cola light for Manda...because that is what she was going to order and he must know how to read minds then. Morg and my chocolate milkshakes come and we wait for the magic to happen, and what do you know, he brings over two glasses of Coca-Cola. We all laugh hysterically and he just had no idea...or did he.... His partner in crime, the other waiter, wanted to take a picture with us. They both smiled and laughed with us and then things hit the fan. We went nuts. Jenna started it by making cross eyed faces and tempting the group of guys sitting on the other side of the window outside. They stared, they all stare. But once Jenna started the craziness it all flew out of control. We were teaching each other funny faces and Morgan was laughing so hard that tears were rolling viciously down her face as she tried to form words. We were causing a scene...luckily there were only like three people in the whole restaurant. The fun didn't stop there, Morgan and I ate our chicken nuggets and rice happily enjoying the coconut pieces that fell out of the meat. Manda and Jen both got salads except Manda's was a lot better because she got a sweet looking bowl. At the end of our meal we got an unexpected surprise. Our waiter brings over a little plate of...well..at the time we had no idea what they were. It was a caramely shot topped off with a TON of whipped cream. He took a picture as we took our free candied shots...except Morgan and mine wouldn't come out of the glass. Our waiter tried helping morgan out by tapping on the bottom making her laugh but still no shot. Jen and Manda both swooned over the deliciousness of the shot while wiping the whipped cream off of their lips. I on the other hand tried again and got the shot to go down. Caramely it was and yummy it was also. Tasted like liquid ice cream and whipped cream. The waiters laughed and brought us our check. We most definitely scored free yummy shots because we are American...and just plain ol' funny.

 In Spain they bring the credit card machine to you...so our waiter stood there looking at our licenses and swiping our cards...10 euros each...BINGO. He got to Morgan's and laughed and laughed at her picture...then he got to mine. Please note that I am a fresh 15 year old with buck teeth and it looks like I have no hair in my photo...oh he laughed at my photo...called the other waiter over and they both heartily laughed at our photos. They got a big kick out of it. The other waiter told us that we weren't supposed to smile in our licenses but we informed him Americans do it with smiles, always. Then they got to Jenna's. They joked that it wasn't her in the picture and you know what her response was... "if that isn't me then who is the thirteen year old boy in hers?" -- she was referring to my license. See picture below for the real deal. 

Me as a 13 year old boy...

The waiter was super busy and was flying around the restaurant. He was outside serving guests out there when he knocked on the window next to Jenna's face. He held up the platter and motioned that he wanted her to come waitress. It was that freaking "I can read your mind" thing again...Out of everyone he picked the one person in our group who is a real live waitress...!!! Coincidence? I think not!! 


We waited around to catch a picture with our waiter before we left..even though we had hardly a half hour to get back to our bus. We were being good girls tonight and going home early. Once we finally caught him he said something to us first in Spanish...the other waiter translated it to "Want to come party and drink with us at 1 am?" We all smiled awkwardly for a few seconds, weighing the options by glancing at each others faces, finally Jenna replied with a  "No we really have to catch the 11 bus." He frowned but took the picture with us anyways. He then said something in Spanish to me and I just laughed...that is what I have to do when I don't know what to say. His waiter friend translated (again) it into "he said tag him on facebook"...He then came back to write his name down and the other waiter followed suit. We just made two more friends....Juan and Giogi. Hahahaha. We decided we wouldn't take further action on adding them on facebook until we were safe in our home country. 

I needed icecream so we hurried two doors down to grab some. Cheap and delicious and the only thing I took from that whole icecream experience was the ice cream scooper man talking about my icecream being "tiger striped...it's dangerous...like the animal, really dangerous" I just responded with a "I think I can handle it". We had 20 minutes to get to the bus station...a solid 20 minute walk...if we were walking FAST. If we missed the 11 bus we had to wait till one am, and that was not going to happen...we would of all been scary scary monsters. We started pumping. Everyone around us probably thought we were mad. Imagine this: Four young girls, holding ice cream, power walking and chatting all at the same time. One heck of a dinner and a show I'd say. We lucked out with the green lights and booked it down the narrow streets, drowning out the honks and the "Bonita"s that were yelled at us. Side note: we seriously feel like celebs...


Just you take a guess at what happens next.


We made it! But barely. The bus was full and there was just a small line of people getting on. The wheels backed out right at eleven with us aboard. 


We got home to Clyde barking, no surprise there, and a chilled home. I'd like to add here that Jenna is so weird. I mean I am weird but she is just cooky. Jenna and Morgan were skyping MaryAnn and all you could here was Jenna howling and saying funny things...none the less my abs definitely got a work out from her crazy words. Dang hilarious that one is. Amanda and Clyde became on one length, he followed her around and when she ran, he ran...when she jumped, miraculously he jumped it was a hoot and a half. 


Another one for the books, I am beginning to think there is not going to be a day where someone doesn't make us feel special and wonderful. We are all dreading going back to the States because no one there will buy us yummy drinks for being outgoing and ridiculous...or call us pretty when we walk by...we are going to be just like everyone else once again...No fun. If it stays this good around here I may just be investing in a longer stay...Mom, I might need some more money ;) Beach tomorrow, soooo pretty much the spf 50+ is covering every crack of my body...goal number one: no more sunburns!